Let’s talk about, SEX, baby!

How many of us have not imagined doing crazy sex in a public place, where can you be caught at any time?
Or with a stranger ... you just see him, you feel the sexual attraction, you do not know and you do not care what his name is, but the sex is crazy and passionate. Or, imagine yourself tied to your eyes and hands, and leave you completely in the hands of your partner (and not, this fantasy did not appear with Christian Gray's entry into our lives, there is a long time ago, just now it seems more ... normal).The chances are that, if you have such fantasies, you think most people.
Unfortunately, the discussion of our sexual fantasies is a taboo topic. And not discussing what I want from a sexual point of view definitely affects the quality of sexual intercourse in the couple (I do not say it, studies say it ... well, I say it :)). Due to the fact that sex is still a shameful topic in many societies (including ours), the chances that we can talk freely about fantasies with our partners are quite low.
Unfortunately, studies have found that it is easier to talk about your sexual desires with a stranger, but not with your partner. Why is this happening? Because for most it's a scary, shameful subject. We think that we will be judged or that others will reject us if we express the content of our fantasies. So I prefer not to express them and just keep them for me. The way I relate to sex, myths and beliefs about sex taken from ancestors influence with certainty our attitude towards sex and sexual fantasies.
In a recent study, Justin Lehmiller, more than 4,000 respondents (American citizens) questioned about their sexual fantasies. The results of the study are fascinating. They were able to identify the most common fantasies of both women and men. The most common fantasy is related to sex with multiple partners (sex in 3, group or orgy). The second involves power, control and tough sex (BSDM fantasies). Novelty, variety and adventure are ranked 3rd (sexual acts in places and new positions).


Then taboo or forbidden activities (eg voyeurism) are classified. Non-monogamous relationships (poliamorphism and swinging) occupy a place. 5. Fantasies involving passion, intimacy and romance or the satisfaction of deeper emotional needs are on the 6th place. Sexual attitude towards same-sex partners (homoeroticism) and experimentation sexuality and sex is on the 7th place. Given the large number of respondents, as I said above, the chances are that if you have these types of sexual fantasies, you are very normal.Normalizing the sexual content of our thinking is extremely important ...
... because in this way we facilitate discussions about sex (an activity that underlies our human needs) and we can act on our wishes that are mutually agreed. And it's also easier to deal with fantasies in the couple's context. Everyone, but we all have sexual fantasies. Only social and cultural barriers make us behave shamefully and shamefully about this subject.
But what about our sexual fantasies about us? Following studies, it seems that fantasies play a more important role than gratification of physical pleasure, namely the satisfaction of much deeper psychological needs.
As we talked about Christian Gray and BDSM fantasies, submissiveness and masochistic activities, what does it say about you having these fantasies? It seems that people with this type of fantasy report more often the need to receive approval and to feel willing. Studies indicate that masochistic acts (the sexual act in which a partner excites when he feels pain) have the effect of increasing the state of mindfulness, in other words, it helps you to concentrate now and now.
Sexual fantasies with multiple partners (group sex) have been correlated with our need to feel sexually sexually or sexually irresistible. The participants who described such fantasies were imagined during the group sex act as the focus of attention, and that made them feel very attractive and desired. Moreover, when they simultaneously satisfy more sexual partners, it makes them feel valid with regard to their sexual abilities.


Sexual fantasies involving romance, intimacy and passion are associated with our desire to feel loved and emotionally connected with our partner. We are fond of love and intimacy just by means of sexual fantasies.
So our sexual fantasies say a lot about our inner world ...

... about our deepest needs. They reflect who we are and are as if designed to meet our unique psychological needs. So I encourage you to talk to your partner about sexual fantasies, so you will create a bridge through which the one near you has access to your deepest needs, thus increasing the trust between you and your two.

As long as it is common, in the bedroom (and not just there) there is nothing to look for shame or silence. And now ... in the end ... what to wish for ... enjoy your fantasies as quickly as possible.
 
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