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Dating, speed dating, online dating platforms ... election, election, election. Sometimes you try the sea with your finger. You talk and meet with more people ... after all, we live in the world of speed, why would not it be the same as dating?
Today you go to a meeting, tomorrow to another, and so on. You are at a click away from the next "potential" partner. You often think that "the pond has a lot over" and you want to catch the bigger fish.
And yet ... it struggles a little, why am I alone? Since I meet with so many people, why do not I meet "that person" ... "the one".
It would normally be that if we have a choice, let us be easier. We no longer live at a time when the choice of partner was limited and relations are no longer built on economic criteria.We have many options ... how hard can it be?
Well ... it is! And it seems that ... just the fact that you have many options makes the choice even more difficult. Let's imagine the following scenario ... I know it happened to you at least once. Swipe right and it's a match! Obviously, the criterion is purely visual, it does not make sense to lie to us.
Start talking, discussions go and you decide to meet and grow, the meeting is a successful one. You get home, you want to see yourself with your data, but ... you start looking for a knot in the rush. If you think well ... the hair was not quite so arranged and neither the shoes nor the shoes fit perfectly!
That's how you stay with the online dating application open on the phone! And you think that somewhere on that app, there is someone who's more "right" for you. On principle, grass is greener on the other side. I dare say the grass is greener where it's wet, but sometimes the mind ... it's playing with us.


For all of this there is a name: the paradox of the election.
Initially, this theory developed by American psychologist Barry Schwartz referred to the economic choices we have to make. As the buyer's product options are diminished, the choice will be made more quickly and more objectively, thus reducing anxiety about the choice itself.
Later, it has been seen as well as with the partner that things are about the same (surely, there are several factors involved in this choice): the more options you have, the harder it is to focus on one. Why? Because every person has qualities that attract you, as well as defects.
If you can, you would like all the qualities you have encountered in more people, packed in one man. Which is impossible. Like in a store ... you're testing a lot of clothes before you find one that suits you. Just as you get out of a store and say "you'll find something better in the other," you do with your partner.And now I come and I ask you ...
Have you thought about how many wonderful people have entered your life and you just rejected them because you thought you'd find something better? Just because you did not have the curiosity to discover them?


Being in a relationship is a choice, being with someone is a choice, love is a choice. I make a conscious decision to invest in you - what you are next to me now - to discover you, to see how things work. Decide consciously to give you time and curiosity. If you always think you will find something better, chances are to stay with no one.

Or you will realize by the way that you have kicked some suitable people and stayed with the one you do not fit at all. So before you make a decision that that person is not for you, give yourself the chance to know the man in front of you.
 
 
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