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28 octombrie 2018

The most difficult 5 things when you have a relationship with a colleague

We spend a lot of time at work, so it's very plausible that some colleagues stick to our throne. But a relationship with someone at work is not without complications.

First, it can affect your individual relationships with other colleagues and, in addition, it can change the dynamics of interactions within the team. However, you should not avoid such a relationship, but only manage it carefully and cautiously.
Because we spend a lot of time with colleagues at work, it is very likely that some of them will become good friends; sometimes it happens, however, to suddenly see these good friends with other eyes, to look attractive to us in a way we did not think about before. It is either the beginning of a romantic relationship or what is called a "proximity attraction", that is, when you start to develop feelings for someone simply because you spend a lot of time with that person. I'm not saying it's a less viable way to start a relationship, but just take a step back and see if that relationship could work outside the office (before you get too involved).
But what you have to remember is that wherever and whenever the spark is on, working relationships are complicated. Sometimes they can turn into life relationships, sometimes they are just adventures, because someone drank a little more at the Christmas party. And sometimes they leave with resignations.
So, what are the risks of a romantic relationship with a colleague?

 1. It can have serious consequences
Why? You can lose your job, feel uncomfortable at work, or you can spoil your professional reputation. In addition, if the relationship does not work, you can find yourself feeling resentful to a colleague, or hitting any movement and not working well in the team.
2. The reason for the attraction could be confusing
Obviously, all relationships are complicated in their own way, and amorous relationships with colleagues are even more complicated. That is why many companies have policies to discourage them, especially if they are involved in leadership. Because it's hard to see if the attraction is genuine or the position in the company (and possibly the power it comes with) is the attraction element. Sometimes the clandestine nature of the relationship makes it even more exciting.
3. Power dynamics complicates things
If you do not have equal positions within the company you are working with, then a relationship with someone in a higher position could complicate the situation even more. That can make both partners think. The one who is in a higher position may wonder if the power makes it more attractive and the other does not hunt some privileges. In turn, the subordinate may fail to advance not necessarily because of the attraction, but for fear of jeopardizing his position. After all, it is not an ordinary situation where you meet someone in a club, and the binder between you is just the mutual attraction and you start somehow from equal positions. Ultimately, we must not ignore the fact that power is a means and an element of seduction, old since the world. But so does the vulnerability!
4. You could be less effective
Obviously, there is a possibility that an amorous relationship with a colleague can affect your work efficiency, because you are too busy thinking about the person next door or waiting for a message telling you if where you can see the lunch break. And this obviously can have negative implications on your career. In addition, it can affect your relationships with other colleagues, especially if your connection is clandestine and somehow they feel that you are hiding something from them and therefore can no longer trust you.

5. Gossips
When you have a relationship with a colleague, you need to be aware that you are exposeing to gossip. At first, maybe the whole story seems funny to you, because you feel in the spotlight, but then you might be irritated. So, if there's more than one flirting between you two, maybe it would be a good idea to make things clear. Or to clarify them together. To avoid the complications, you can even call the Human Resources department, make your connection known, and put an end to rumors and speculation.
None of these complicated issues necessarily imply that a relationship with an office colleague is at the head of a fallen plot. After all, you can fall in love anytime and anywhere, and you can not control your feelings. You just have to be very honest with yourself and answer honestly to two questions: what is it that attracts you to your colleague? And if it's worth taking the risks involved in the relationship.

About me


Sarah Nelson

Life Is Too Short For Boring Clothes!